Betrayal- A gift planned in Love.

I’m going to share this story, because I feel the lesson will touch many people. For those of us who have had our hearts shattered into a million little pieces, we can rest assured that God DOES have a plan, and that that plan is ALWAYS good for the evolvement of our soul.

For privacy purposes, I’m changing this person’s name to Linda, which in Spanish means “lovely” and that name matches this person's heart and soul perfectly.

My friend Linda came to me, asking me to do an illumination on her eating/weight issues. She said she’d like to know the root cause of it. Seeing a Shaman is different from seeing a therapist in that we do soul work, which often entails journeying into past lives. Some of the issues we have today are hundreds of years old, that we’ve carried over from past lives. We come to work on them, over and over and over again, until we get it right. (I call that Grace. You don’t get one time to find Jesus and you’re banished to Hell forever, you get as many lifetimes as you want, to “get it right.”)

I didn’t know much about Linda, only that she had just gone through a divorce. We’d only met a couple times, but her heart is as big as this country and I loved her almost instantly.

I did a remote Illumination for her, only telling her the day I would do it, not the time. A remote Illumination is when the person doesn’t have to physically be before me. It’s why prayers work. I’ve done Reiki this way as well. I prayed for her angels to be with her so she wouldn’t suffer physical ailments. I did this, because sometimes the client can feel lots of pressure in the area we’re working on, and in severe cases (like I’ve suffered) they’ll get vomiting or diarrhea, as their body is literally trying to empty their body of the negative/heavy energies. In some cases, as the “healer” I can take that heavy energy from/for them and process that for them.

I worked in her chakras and in one of them, found the root of this problem. This work is different than Reiki, in that I’m ACTUALLY going into the soul’s energy centers (the Chakras) and seeing things that are in there. We keep lies/false & limiting beliefs in our Chakras. Energy can build up and block them. I won’t go into what condition her chakras were in, the point of this story is the information/lesson that presented itself.

In one Chakra, where she kept the seed of her “weight/eating” issues I was shown the pool of life. This presents itself to me (I’m not sure of how this shows up for other Shamans)  as a beautiful, dark blue, luminous pool of water, with a long thread, that is also illuminated and suspended above and down into the pool. This is the thread of life. It is the thread that connects us to each other and also to our past lives. When this comes up I know I have to journey into the underworld, where I can access past lives,  to find the seed of the issue. A large Turtle presents itself in there (I’ll write of my first soul journey in a different entry) and I’m always told “no matter what,  don’t let go of my shell, and with your other hand, hold on to the thread of life. After my first Shamanic journey, I researched the kind of turtle that presents itself, and it’s a “Painted Turtle” (SO PERFECT!) this turtle is able to go on land and in water, which is also perfect for taking me on journeys into this pool.

When Turtle appeared, we jumped into the pool. One hand on his shell (he’s huge by the way! Stands well over seven feet tall!) and the other hand on the Thread of Life, much like a scuba diver dives, holding onto the line.  We rushed by several lives, until we got to the one that held the seed of Linda’s issues. Her issues aren’t eating issues, just to be clear. They’re self love and self worth issues, the eating is a symptom of these feelings. Plus- cupcakes and donuts are legit yummy, so let’s not judge here.

To me, the past lives appear like a doll house, or a layered cake! Each layer is visible like a movie, and they’re stacked on top of each other. We “swim” by them until we get to the seed of the problem. At first I’m able to see the life from a separate perspective, but eventually I’m put in the person(s) bodies, so that I can feel their emotions and intentions in the given situations.

This life felt like it was 300 years ago, in Ireland. Linda was married in that life to the same man she’s married to in this life. They had a good, but simple home which was made of HUGE stones…looking much like they would have built their own home, or the men in the village would have all chipped in to help each other build their own homes. They weren’t rich, nor poor, it felt like a solid good, but simple life. In that life, her husband cheated on her with another woman. The event struck her so deeply- she felt worthless and not good enough. In fact those were her thoughts as she processed the blow, “I’m not pretty enough. I’m not good enough. I’m not enough.” Thus beginning the “seeds” of the self-love issues she suffers today. In this life Linda is a “full-figured” woman. I think she’s a healthy woman who has had a couple babies and deserves the right to have a little padding on her hips- but to each their own.

I called forth the soul of her husband, who came forward with SO MUCH LOVE exuding off of him, I wept. He exuded the SAME amount of love Jesus does, when Jesus shows up in the Ether to work with me or give me guidance. Closing my eyes, I still weep at remembering how much love he delivered in his message for her. I asked him, “why did you choose to incarnate with Linda in this life?” He said (with SO MUCH LOVE!) “I love her SO MUCH that I agreed to betray her, so that she could learn to love herself separate from the opinions and actions of others.”

I was floored. This was a first for me. A soul ADMITTED that something we deem “bad,” such as adultery, was PRE-PLANNED and agreed to, in Heaven, so that the other soul could learn self-love. WOW. I thought to his face, as his soul appeared in the perfect condition all of our souls are.  I answered, “You love her so much you agreed to this? What?!”  His love never dimming, he nodded with a giant, loving grin and said, “Yes! I love her SO much I agreed to come in with her in this life and betray her, so that she could learn to love herself separate from the opinions and actions of others.”

Wow. I thought, and simply stood there, soaking in the message for a few minutes. 

I then called forth Linda’s soul, and had them stand next to each other. Their souls presented with an illuminated cord between them, connecting them at their belly buttons. “their cord must be healed.” I heard my guide tell me. So, I performed a new healing technique God and my angels showed me the day before, in our monthly Shamanic meeting, in a journey I took to what I believe may be the upper world. The information was given to me in the same space I had my very first, huge encounter where my angels told me what my job on Earth was, and taught me how to perform some energy healings. It was this same space “they” taught me this new method of healing cords.

The cords between us all are the same as the “thread of life” they tie us all together, like a  spider web. Imagine a real web- some lines are main lines with a bunch of tiny lines running in between them. Some cords (I’ve been told by my angels) are “ok” to cut. Some lines, are our main lines, and to cut them would prove to be too devastating for the stability of our little lines. For example if you’re married and have 8 children, but your husband has hurt you over and over again, though you may WANT to cut that cord, it wouldn’t be wise, as you have 8 kids between you, thus interfering too negatively on the little lines between them. I have a dearly treasured friend, who, while doing his healing, I felt a tug on the center of my hand, and when I asked my angels what this sensation was they said, “he is one of your main lines.” I then giggled and played with the line, pulling with my left hand and feeling it in the middle of my right palm. It fascinated me!!!

So, given that Linda and her husband still have work that needs to be done, I was told their cord couldn’t be severed, as it would affect this life and future lives too much in a negative way. My angels instead instructed me to heal the cord, to infuse it with love. They said, “Grab the energy from the “All of Existence” and funnel it into their cord. You can’t sever it, but you can heal it to complete the bond.” So I did just that, grabbed what presents itself to me like the Galaxy, acted as if I could pull it down, like a funnel and infused their cord with love. Upon hearing my angels say “That is sufficient” I sent the "Energy of All of Existence” back up into the Heavens and sent their souls back into the Ether.

Now understanding the motives of the betrayal, and hearing of one of Linda’s lessons, Turtle and I could now return to deliver the message. We journeyed back up the line, passed all of Linda’s past lives and were back on the shore of the pond. Turtle then told me, “if you remove her lie of her worthlessness, you must fill the void with something. Fill it with a truth.” So in the Chakra where this seed was found and healed, I whispered, “you are perfect, whole and complete as you are right this second.”

Once I completed the illumination I reported my findings to her. This is where the magic comes in! This is my favorite part!!!!  Linda told me that in THIS life her husband did have an affair (or a few, at the moment I write this, I don’t remember exactly) and that it’s been difficult for her. (obviously!) I didn’t know this prior to this illumination, only that for some reason they were divorced.

The most AMAZING part was, when I described the past life I was taken to, she told me in a past life regression class, about 18 months ago, she went to a life where she felt it was 300 years ago, possibly in Ireland, where she had a “simple but good” home MADE OF LARGE STONES and she knows her husband in that life is her husband in this life! I COULD HAVE PASSED OUT I WAS SO EFFING EXCITED! In that Past Life Regression, she felt the lesson was “it’s possible to have a simple but good life.” She wasn’t shown then the betrayal, only the main points. 

I thought, “OH MY GOODNESS!!!! GOD SO KNEW WHAT HE WAS DOING!!! He was like “I’m going to show you this part of this life, because in a little over a year you’re going to go to a little brown girl for a healing and you’re going to know it’s legit by My giving her the SAME life with more information to help heal your soul.”

God and this work are blowing my mind every day!!!!! 

I’ve done 12 Illuminations so far, and though there is magic in all of them, this lesson of love and betrayal strikes me the most. I’ve always believed that we plan EVERYTHING in Heaven and agree to it with God and people we’ll meet in this life. Even things we as humans deem bad. What we MUST look at is THE LOVE WITH WHICH THIS IS ALL PLANNED. And what we come to “learn” whatever emotion an experience- a “soul blow” conjures, we come to exercise the EXACT OPPOSITE emotion, so that we can better reflect the face of our maker.  Linda felt “worthless,” which should move her to exercise things that cause her to learn to love herself, as she is, no matter what other people say or do or think. 

Hold on to that. Next time you get a “soul blow.” Next time you’re hit with a betrayal, or an event that shatters and changes the make-up of who you are- ask yourself, “what am I feeling?” Did it conjure anger, sadness, worthlessness, powerlessness, etc- whatever it is, NEXT think of what the opposite emotion of that is, and KNOW that that is what you came here to learn!!! You are important, you are powerful, you are compassionate, you are loved, you are worth all things good! Imagine how different we could make the world if instead of holding grudges or getting revenge, we could see our ‘abuser’ as our GIFT and say, “Thank you. Thank you, for you help me exercise self-love.” or “you help me exercise compassion,” etc. 

Healing, self-love and evolving is our ability to see things as they are- not internalizing the things we’ve endured and allowing them to weigh us down. We come to feel, to hurt, to love and to heal. Each of us comes here to do these things.